Dealing with humans

Hey guys :) Today I'll be writing another blog post about a specific topic and not a blog post about all the stuff I've been up to and just random stuff in my head haha!
So the very interesting heading up there.. 'Dealing with Humans'. It literally makes me sound like I am alien or something but hey, some people really seem to be from another world(AND ARE SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND!)

    So, quite recently I have realised that my time is precious and that I should spend it wisely. To spend it on the things I love to do and not regret, but more importantly, to spend it with the right people. I have met so many people that are in my life for all the wrong reasons. People who just want to gain something from me or just love 'drama'. Am I the only one who has 'friends' that you have fought with several times then make up but you still have this feeling like they are still against you or secretly hating on you? Whilst typing that sentence one particular quote I thought of was 'Most of the time the one you would take a bullet for is usually the one behind the gun.'

I couldn't agree more.

     However, I'm not saying that we should be overly insecure or so 'afraid' that we don't want to meet new people or trust anyone. I'm just saying that when you do meet someone, you have to listen to yourself. You, yourself, will know whether you have this 'secret, unknown' barrier in between you and them. You will know when you are not 100% comfortable with them and you will know when you are not yourself/ are straining yourself to do something else you would normally do.

If you really can't figure anything out and your thoughts are a mess, you probably haven't been spending much time with yourself. Learn to love being with people. But also learn to love being with yourself. You need to get to know and understand everything about yourself because no one else will know you as much as you do. Discover things you love as well as hate. Learn to go with your instincts and trust yourself. 
     I personally am both a people person as well as a kept-to-myself person. I like the background noise of giggles and chatter. I also like plain white silence. Yes, thats how I picture silence. 
 I like the comfort and security of someone beside me. Whether they are my friends or just family. I like talking about the things that happened that day or that week. I also like listening to their stories. 
But, I also feel a sense of independence and easiness by myself. I like bus rides home with no one beside me. Just the sounds in my iPod. I like how I think about everything and anything when I watch the world outside that window and get lost in my thoughts. 

     Sometimes, I really find the need to get away from all these people. All these humans. Its times like this when the only person I need, is myself. It's not selfish or narcissistic or ungrateful. Its completely normal that sometimes you just need time alone. To listen to yourself and just think in peace.     

     Sometimes there are so many people with messy thoughts, messy emotions, messy words, messy actions that you just want to part with the messiness. 

     Sometimes the room is too small or there are too many people that all you want to do is run and hide in a quiet corner when you can actually hear your thoughts again. Where your senses can actually settle down and your eyes can actually focus on something that is not moving again. 

After all this jazz, its time to face the world.

There are many types of people in this world. 7 billion people is a whole lot of numbers. A whole lot of people. And in your life you will encounter some people who are what people call, 'mean'. An understatement. In reality, these people are horrible, selfish, parsimonious, egotistical, penurious, annoying, hurtful, insane, inhuman and completely oblivious.

You will find someone you love with all your heart but you'll also find someone you hate that much.

It works as a balance.

You can't possibly live under a rock your entire life and say that thats the only way you can refrain from getting hurt. You have to go out there one day and face everything and everyone. Your fears will always be right behind you but you can't let them squeeze you dry. There will certainly be people there to step on your hands when you are trying to get back onto safe grounds. The people that will push you back down into the hot hard earth they stamp their feet on. The people that can crush you like you're that pathetic piece of dirty paper someone left their footprints on that can no longer be used.

Of course those footprints will forever be ingrained in your heart. The black marks that can never be erased and the more you try to erase it the more you will tear. 

However, you just have to understand that all these moments with all these humans and all these challenges and all the times you have been the bowling pin, will make you that much more of a strong and beautiful person.

I know this was a long post but it was all I had to say :)

Hope you guys found inspiration & enjoyed this post.

LOVE YA!

Signing out...

CLL